At the same time, while it is common to see women having a lower sex drive than their male partners, it is also vital that you take time to understand why you may be experiencing a loss in libido. Understanding the root cause will help you solve any issues before seeking out solutions on increasing your sex drive. There is no denying that a significant difference in sex drives between spouses can cause a strain on the relationship. Feelings of guilt or dissatisfaction are not uncommon! The good news is, there are several natural things you can try to ramp up your libido if you feel like you are on the lower end of the spectrum. Let’s check them out!
What Exactly Is the Libido and What Is Considered Normal?
Libido, meaning sexual desire, is just a fancy word for–yup, you guessed it–SEX DRIVE! An individual’s libido describes how much a person desires sexual connection. Someone with a high sex drive might think about sex and engage in intimacy more often, whereas an individual with a low sex drive may not think about or be interested in engaging in sex very frequently. I hate to break it to you, but there really isn’t a standardized medical measurement of what counts as “high” or “low” sex drive. Simply put, there is a very wide range when it comes to determining “normal” sex drive in healthy adults. All that to say, the best way to determine if a problem exists is to evaluate whether or not a significant change has occurred one way or another in how you view your own sex drive.
Why We Experience a Loss in Libido
Before we jump into specifics, I think it is important to note that there is no correct or incorrect level of sex drive for women. Furthermore, there is no rule on how often the average couple should be engaging in physical intimacy! Research suggests that the female libido differs from men’s, and women naturally have a lower sex drive than men do (Stritof, 2019). Sex drives, especially for women, can also be a finicky thing! Women’s sexual desires tend to be multifaceted and more complex than men’s, and various internal and external factors may cause us to see a low sex drive in women. Common causes for a loss of sexual desire in women include:
Sexual problems: You might want to consider whether you are having a physical issue that makes sex unenjoyable. Things like pain during sex or the inability to orgasm could make you lose your desire to engage in sexual activities!Fatigue: Exhaustion from being a parent, from your work life, caring for a loved one, or even just from the mundane daily tasks can contribute to a low sex drive.Stress: Stress and anxiety from your family, job, or anything else can surely be all-consuming and will have a direct impact on your desire for intimacy.Relationship issues: Lots of women require emotional closeness and connection before engaging in intimacy. Therefore, problems in your relationship may be causing you to lose your desire for sexual activity. Things like lack of connection, poor communication, trust issues, or unresolved conflicts and arguments can all play a role when considering low sex drive in women.Pregnancy, childbirth, and breastfeeding: Throughout your pregnancy and breastfeeding journey, your hormones will constantly be changing, which in turn can dampen your sex drive. After giving birth, exhaustion, changes in body image, and the pressures of caring for a newborn may also decrease your sexual desires.Medications: Certain medications, such as antidepressants, medicines for high blood pressure, and oral contraceptives, all can reduce libido. Talk to your healthcare provider if you believe your medications are affecting your sex drive!Medical conditions: Many long-term medical conditions can negatively affect sex drive due to physical and psychological factors. These may include diabetes, depression, thyroid disorders, heart disease, cancer, and arthritis. Speak to your healthcare provider if you think your low libido is a result of a medical condition.Age: A reduced sex drive is not an inevitable part of aging, but many women experience a loss of libido as they age and enter menopause due to the lowering levels of sex hormones.
Natural Ways to Increase Your Sex Drive
First things first, before we go into natural ways to ramp up your sex drive, we need to rule out physical cause. If you are experiencing low or loss of libido, it may be a good idea to bring this up with your healthcare provider! It may be neccessary to get ALL of your hormone levels checked in order to rule out any hormonal imbalances that are causing your low sex drive. Furthermore, if you are experiencing any physical symptoms that are causing you to be uninterested in intimacy, such as pain during sex or mental blocks, this is also something you will want to speak to your healthcare provider about. Now that we have ruled out potential physical causes, let’s get into to the fun stuff! There are a variety of things you can do in your everyday life and additional healthy lifestyle changes that have the ability to make a big difference in your desire for sex! If you are wondering how to increase sex drive, below are some natural approaches you can take. Give one (or all 😉) of them a try!
The Takeaway
Low libido can be a complex issue when dealing with physical, psychological, and relationship components. Not to mention, mismatched sex drives between spouses may cause strains in the relationship. However, getting down to the root cause of things by being open and honest with your spouse as well as your healthcare provider will help you come to a solution much quicker! It is important to remember that every individual is different and every couple is different as well! It is perfectly normal to see a wide range in sexual desires, even when looking at the same person. Sometimes it may take a little time and experimentation to find out what works best for both of you. However, I could definitely think of worse ways to spend my time, couldn’t you?! 😉 Sources: Landau, M. (2018, April 3). Everyday Health. “9 Natural Ways to Boost Your Sex Life”. Mayo Clinic Staff. (2020, December 17). Mayo Clinic. “Low Sex Drive In Women”. NHS Staff. (2020, January 6). NHS. “Loss of libido (reduced sex drive)”. Severson, A. (2020, December 11). Healthline. “Boost Your Libido with These 10 Natural Tips”. Stritof, S. (2019, December 11). Very Well Mind. “Help for Women Dealing With Low Libido”. Sutton, J. (2019, August 29). Healthline. “30 Foods and Herbs That May Boost Female Sex Drive”. Tennant, L. (2020, December 7). I’m Aware. “Low Sex Drive? Here’s 11 Natural Ways To Boost Your Libido”. Tresca, A. (2014, November 26). Contemporary OB/GYN. “Common Chemical Associated With Low Sex Drive in Women”. Villines, Z. (2020, January 23). Medical News Today. “10 Ways To Boost Libido”.